2011-03-07

There's no earthly way of knowing which direction we are going

Good Evening!


Hope you enjoyed your day.
Monday is the day of the 3 F's: First, Fast and Furious.
So let's simply ignore and move on to the challenge of the day: My parents!

Both my parents are still in this life. My mother, Lonni, and my father, Carsten. They are my parents, but both re-married many years ago.

I don't remember much from my parents being married - they divorced when I was 8. This might be the reason why I myself has developed such a go-easy attitude when it comes to my own marriage. I don't have a lot of demands and expectations. We rarely have any confrontations, and we never quarrel. My parents marriage was (at least as far as I remember) full of confrontations and bitter words. And I am simply allergic to that sort of living.

Parenhood is about taking care of your offspring. When my parents marriage ended, I sometimes wonder what impact that had on their ability to fullfill their parenthood assignment. - I do believe they did their best under the conditions that they had. However I felt the separation made it easier for them to forget their responsibilities.

My father spent his professional life as an army officer. My mother worked outside the home as well. They were both strictly conservative in their upbringing, and had huge expectations on everything such as behaviour, table-manners, education, finding the right spouse, carrier etc. I'm sorry to say, I failed on the most.

Sadly enough, I never got a tight relationship with any of my parents. We never have any deep talks - we small-talk about harmless topics, because we disagree about the most in this world. We have different values, different political views, different views on life in general etc.

You cannot change what was, and it's not a good idea to tell your parents that your childhood was lonely. Let's just conclude that I - to use my mother's words - "refused to listen to the adults" and therefore missed the opportunity to become a decent person.

Here we are - the happy family - at the yearly christmas photo from 1967:


Cheers for now

 

2 comments:

cieldequimper said...

I'm sorry. It's so good to have a good relationship with one's parents.

Christopher Raun Leth said...

The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together. ~Erma Bombeck

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